Memories of You Read online

  “What about the rest of them?” Hunter gestured towards the rest of the displays around the room.

  They were all the artistic nudes Luke had done of Hunter. Various angles, styles, and poses. Different moods and themes. All captured Hunter as their main subject.

  “I never gave you permission to put me on display like this,” said Hunter, turning towards Luke. “I know we were close once before, but this is an invasion of my privacy. Why would you do this?”

  “I didn’t,” insisted Luke. “I got here when you did. I had no part in setting all of this up. I gave Allen more than enough paintings to fill the gallery with. He shouldn’t have used these. They’re personal paintings I did a long time ago. If anything I’m just as betrayed here as you are.”

  “The paintings you gave me were awful,” said Allen as he approached. Before either of them could say anything, he slid an arm around each of their shoulders and pulled them close. “Now smile.”

  Luke was about to protest, but Allen immediately cut him off with a proclamation to the entire room.

  “Ladies and Gentlemen,” Allen’s voice carried well across the crowd and they turned to look at him. “I present to you the stars of tonight’s show. Your beloved artist, Luke Morrison, and his muse, Hunter Kilder.”

  Immediately, the crowd began to flock towards them. They blocked off the exit as they pressed to get closer to Hunter and Luke. Questions, requests, and compliments flooded their way in an indecipherable wave. Allen disappeared and left them alone to fend for themselves.

  Hunter looked bewildered as people closed in around him.

  Luke glanced behind him; the path was mostly clear. He could make a beeline for the back door and be out into the alley behind the gallery before they realized what was happening. But he couldn’t leave Hunter.

  In a single decisive motion, Luke grasped Hunter’s hand. Hunter’s eyes flashed to meet his, and for a moment it looked like he was going to pull away. But the frenzy of the crowd was too much for them to remain in place.

  Hands linked, Luke broke into a sprint with Hunter in tow. They pulled away from the crowd and darted between the displays towards the backdoor. Never once did Luke risk looking back. Right now, all that mattered was getting them out of there.

  They broke through the back door and out into the alley. The cold air whipped around them and stung at their eyes. Luke kept running, pulling Hunter after him as he headed down the alley in the direction of the city park. It was the warmth of Hunter’s hand that kept him moving forward and the knowledge that once he stopped he would have to let go again.

  AS THEY REACHED THE edge of the park, Hunter finally pulled his hand free.

  “You can stop. I don’t think they’re following us,” called Hunter as Luke’s momentum propelled him further.

  Luke gasped for breath as he finally came to a stop. Each breath puffed out in steamy clouds as he sucked in the icy air that stung at his lungs.

  Stars had begun to emerge in the night sky overhead. The park was illuminated by lampposts that lined the trails and benches. Nearby, the outdoor skating rink was full of people making lazy circuits around the ice.

  “You’ve got to believe me,” said Luke at last, turning towards Hunter. “I didn’t mean for any of those paintings to be seen by the public. I admit I thought about it, but I decided not to do it. I didn’t want you to be upset or embarrassed when you walked into the gallery.”

  Hunter shook his head slowly. “I believe you. I’m getting the feeling that this was all Allen. He’s done nothing but subtly hint that you’ve been miserable lately and I needed to talk to you. I think he wanted to force the issue.”

  “He’s always fancied himself something of a matchmaker,” said Luke with a frown. “Still, I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

  “It’s not like the paintings weren’t flattering in a way,” continued Hunter. “I’ve looked at myself naked in the mirror a hundred times, and I never look as good as I did in those paintings.” He chuckled. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

  Silence fell over them for several moments, threatening to end their encounter. Luke was desperate for it to continue.

  “So, I know it’s not tomorrow, but we’re in the park. Did you want to have that discussion now?” he asked.

  “We can.” Hunter approached one of the nearby benches and sat down. “My back has been acting up lately,” he explained with a groan as he leaned back against the bench and stretched. “I can’t stay on my feet right now.”

  Luke cautiously approached, uncertain if he should join Hunter or not.

  Noticing his hesitation, Hunter gently patted the bench beside him. He waited until Luke was seated before taking a deep breath. He looked as if he was trying to mentally prepare himself for what he was about to say.

  “Do you remember how sick I was that day?” asked Hunter. “And you came over and took care of me.”

  “Of course,” said Luke with a nod.

  “You also told me to go to the doctor if it continued.”

  Luke nodded again. Fear began creeping into his heart. Was it some side effect from Hunter’s head injury? Was he dying? That would explain why he was suddenly so willing to talk to Luke after a week of keeping to himself.

  “I didn’t go right away,” continued Hunter. “It was off and on. Some days it was bad, some days it was good. I just sort of dealt with it for a while.”

  Luke’s heart ached. If only he’d known. He would’ve been there to help in an instant. He would have dragged Hunter to the hospital if he’d had to. Whatever it took to make sure the fragile omega was in good health, Luke would’ve done it.

  “I was really lonely,” said Hunter with a sigh. “So when Vincent reached out to me again, I let him come over. Unfortunately, I was sick again that day. It had been going on for so long, and I was so miserable. He was the only one I’d seen in a long time, so I asked him to take me to the hospital.”

  Luke silently clenched his jaw and bit back all of the acidic remarks that rose to his lips. As awful as Vincent was, Hunter had been more willing to ask him for help than anyone else. That fact alone struck Luke deeply and left him feeling as if he’d been sucker punched in the gut.

  “So, I was at the hospital and they ran some tests and checked some things,” continued Hunter. “I didn’t think they were going to find anything wrong with me. But they did. Or maybe it’s not something really wrong...I don’t know actually.”

  “Hunter, what is it?” Luke asked. His throat had gone dry and he felt as if his chest was about to implode. Whatever was wrong, he wanted to be there to help Hunter through it. It didn’t matter what the issue was, he would find a way to stay by Hunter’s side.

  Hunter looked away for a moment as if trying to figure out the right words to use. He seemed to be struggling. Several times he opened his mouth to speak but closed it again without saying anything.

  “Look, I know things are awkward between us,” said Luke quickly, “but I want to be there for you. Whatever it is you’re going through, I want to help—“

  “I’m pregnant!” blurted Hunter, stunning Luke into silence.

  Luke blinked and tried to collect his thoughts. Hunter was...pregnant? Did that mean...what did that mean?

  “Are you sure?” was the only thing Luke could think to say.

  Hunter nodded. “They did a blood test and an ultrasound. Apparently I’m roughly twelve weeks along.” He rose from the bench, opened his coat, and pulled up his shirt. The slight swell of his belly was just visible above the top of his jeans.

  Luke felt his chest tighten at the sight of Hunter’s pregnant stomach. He had to restrain himself to keep from reaching out and touching it. It didn’t help that Hunter’s skin had always been irresistible to Luke, and he wanted to touch him anyway.

  “Twelve...” Luke’s voice trailed off as Hunter bundled up again and returned to his seat.

  “Yes,” said Hunter. “I was pregnant before the accident.”

&n
bsp; “How does that even make sense? You were in the hospital, shouldn’t they have noticed something?”

  “Something to do with how early it was and how short the hospital stay was. I guess even blood tests can’t pick it up that soon.” Hunter shrugged.

  “We...us...our...baby.” Luke’s thoughts reeled, and he struggled to form a complete sentence to express himself. This was a baby he and Hunter made together. Probably while they were planning their wedding. In fact, it was likely that night when he’d brought home the brochures for a resort in Maui and told Hunter that was where they were spending their honeymoon.

  “Yeah, it’s ours.” Hunter’s voice lacked the thrill that Luke felt fluttering inside of him. “To be honest, I’m kind of freaking out a little. I don’t remember making this baby. I don’t know if I can go through a full pregnancy and give birth to a baby that I feel no attachment to.”

  “I...I understand how this would be hard on you,” said Luke. “I know you didn’t ask for this. I just...” his voice trailed off as he tried to figure out his feelings. What did he want right now? Asking Hunter to go through with a pregnancy he didn’t want wasn’t fair, but deep inside Luke knew he wanted this baby.

  “I called my mom,” continued Hunter. “She told me that I owed it to my past self to go through with the pregnancy. She also pretty much told me I’m an idiot for running away from my past and trying to separate myself from it so much.”

  “Melinda can be a little harsh sometimes,” said Luke, forcing himself to look up at the sky. He knew if he looked over at Hunter he would only stare at the bump hidden beneath his jacket.

  “The thing is,” Hunter began, “I’m starting to think that maybe she was right.”

  Luke risked a glance at Hunter and found him looking back. They locked eyes for a moment, and Luke tried to find the meaning in what Hunter had said.

  “You and I had sex,” said Hunter after a moment. “If I hadn’t been already pregnant, there’s a chance I would’ve gotten pregnant then, right?”

  Luke nodded slowly. He didn’t trust himself to speak.

  “The things I accused you of that night were cruel,” continued Hunter. “Of course you’re still in love with who I was before. You were going to marry me and that kind of love isn’t just going to go away. I think, maybe, somewhere inside I might still love you too. But those memories are lost to me. All I know for certain, Luke, is I like you. You’ve been kind to me and I enjoyed the time we’ve spent together.”

  Luke felt his heart grow a little lighter. Still, he forced himself into silence. Part of him was convinced he must be dreaming and any word would cause him to wake up.

  “I still don’t know how I feel about this baby,” said Hunter, pressing his hand against his stomach. “But if you want it, I’m willing to carry it to term for you.”

  It took several tries for Luke to speak without his voice cracking. When he finally looked Hunter in the eye, he could feel tears beginning to form. He hadn’t thought something like this would make him so emotional. He’d never pictured himself as one of those spouses that cried with joy when they learned their partner was pregnant.

  “Yes,” his voice was hoarse. “I want it. I do.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  “Just stop and consider what you’re doing here. It’s a huge mistake. You can’t just go through with this.” Vincent stood in the hall outside of Hunter’s door and tried to plead his case.

  It was too early for this. The only reason Hunter had even answered the door was because he’d been expecting Luke. He had been plagued by aches and pains all night and unable to get a decent amount of sleep. Being faced down by Vincent made everything about a hundred times worse.

  “What have I ever done that gave you the slightest idea that you have any say in this matter?” asked Hunter. He was done stepping on eggshells around Vincent. The other man had shown, time and time again, he wasn’t interested in just being friends. He didn’t seem to care what boundaries or guidelines Hunter tried to set either.

  “I’ve already told you that I can’t help it. I worry about you. I worry about the lies and manipulation that Luke is putting you through.” Vincent looked sincere. Too bad Hunter wasn’t buying it anymore. “Just let me in so we can talk.”

  “Look, I don’t want to talk. I’ve already made up my mind. You can’t respect my decisions, and I’m tired of putting up with your melodrama. I tried to be friends with you, Vincent, but that seems impossible,” explained Hunter. “So I’m done talking. I’m done listening. Please, just leave.” Before Vincent could say anything else, Hunter shut the door and locked it.

  “Hunter!? Hunter, open this door! Hunter, let me in! You can’t just shut me out like this. All I ever did was try to take care of you. Hunter, please. I love you.” Vincent rattled the handle and pounded on the door. It seemed he wasn’t going to go quietly.

  Hunter sighed and pulled out his cell phone. For a moment, he hesitated. Should he call Luke? He was certain the alpha would come flying to his rescue. If he was being honest with himself, he would have liked to see Luke facing down Vincent again. If only because he liked the thought of watching two alphas spar over him.

  He shook away those thoughts. Such a scenario could end really badly. Besides, he was more than capable of rescuing himself. Sort of. He called building security. A few minutes later, Vincent’s shouts died down. There was a heated exchange in the hallway.

  “Fine, Hunter, I’ll leave!” shouted Vincent one last time. “I hope you don’t regret this.”

  Hunter peaked through the peephole in the door, checking to see if the coast was clear before texting Luke. The last thing he had wanted was for the two of them to end up in a fist fight or something.

  Thankfully, reconciling with Luke had improved Hunter’s outlook on life dramatically. There was still a lot he wasn’t prepared for, but knowing he wouldn’t be going through any of it alone was a relief. All he wanted to do right now was forget about his run-in with Vincent.

  “Look, I know that we’re not ‘together’ or anything, but I feel like this is important. Even if you don’t want to raise the baby, I’d like him to know who his father is and see that we have a good relationship with one another,” said Luke as he and Hunter sat in Hunter’s apartment.

  The doctors had given Hunter something for his nausea, but he still felt queasy and didn’t have much of an appetite. To remedy this, he’d invited Luke over to cook some more chicken soup for him. While they waited for the soup to cook, they sat at the kitchen table.

  “I understand,” said Hunter with a frown. “I just don’t see what going to see a movie has to do with any of it.”

  “One of your biggest complaints about most things is that you can’t remember any of it. Have you ever been to a movie theater? Then let’s do that. Let’s make some memories for you and get to know one another a little more in the process.” Luke looked excited about the prospect.

  “You’re not just trying to get into my pants again, are you?” asked Hunter suspiciously.

  “I...I mean if you’re offering...” Luke grinned at him.

  Hunter laughed. He’d missed these conversations with Luke during the few weeks they’d been apart. He liked talking with him like this. The talks he’d had with Vincent had never compared to these.

  “I don’t think so,” said Hunter. “But fine. We can try going to a movie. I don’t know that it’s really that big of a deal though.”

  If he’d learned anything over the last few months, it was people didn’t give up easily. Even when they were told something was impossible, they made it happen. Hunter knew their conversation in the park had reignited Luke’s hope for their relationship.

  His feelings on the matter were still confused. He’d meant what he’d said in the park. He liked Luke, and perhaps somewhere deep down he maybe even loved him. But Hunter still held back. Even with this baby on the way there was something missing. Something more he still hadn’t felt. He couldn’t have explained w
hat it was though because he still didn’t know himself.

  The baby only complicated things. He was almost certain he couldn’t be a father to this child growing inside of him. He was glad Luke was excited about it, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel any sort of emotion about the pregnancy at all. He tried to frame it in the context of the sex he and Luke had recently, but even then he still felt nothing. On some level, Hunter feared that he was emotionally broken.

  How could he be a parent to a child towards which he felt nothing?

  “If you don’t want to go to a movie we don’t have to,” said Luke. “I honestly don’t care what we do, I just want to start making some memories that involve both of us.” He looked so sincere as he spoke that Hunter couldn’t help but smile softly.

  Reaching across the table, Hunter took Luke’s hands in his own. “Okay. Let’s make some memories. I’ll trust your judgment here since I obviously have no idea where to even start.”

  Luke looked gleeful as he raised Hunter’s hand to his lips and kissed it gently. “If you’re feeling up to it, why don’t we go for a drive after lunch?” suggested Luke. “I’ll give you a tour of the city.” The dorky smile on his face made Hunter’s heart skip a beat. Why did he have to be so disarmingly adorable?

  “I didn’t know you had a car,” said Hunter.

  Luke winked as he rose from his chair. “My dear sweet Hunter, there’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

  THE BUILDINGS OF THE city slowly passed by as Luke drove them through the downtown shopping district.

  Hunter had expected more of a commentary to go along with the tour as unfamiliar landmarks flashed by the windows. Luke, however, seemed to have something else in mind.

  They eventually left the shopping district behind and passed into a more industrialized zone. Hunter couldn’t even begin to fathom what they might be doing here among the tall production buildings with their towering chimneys and warehouses stuffed with products and materials.