Memories of You Page 9

  Minutes passed before Luke finally ceased. His chest was heaving, and his face was flushed with effort. His eyes stung, and he realized he’d been fighting back tears. He felt drained of emotion now. He had nothing left to give.

  “Better?” asked Allen, gingerly picking his way across the paint splattered war zone.

  “I...” Luke shook his head slowly. “I’ll paint over these and try again.”

  “No, no,” said Allen, putting a hand on Luke’s shoulder. “They’re perfect now.”

  Luke looked at him and frowned. “They’re ruined.”

  “You’re an artist, Luke, you look at them the way an artist would. You see a ruined painting of a city scene. I see an idyllic scene marred by the frustration and reality of life. I see glimpses—moments—of happiness that we make for ourselves between the messy and chaotic happenstance of our day to day existence.” Allen grinned from ear to ear. “This is a departure from your normal style, but I think it’s also exactly the sort of thing we need as the centerpiece of the show.”

  Luke sighed. “So what, I should make more of these?”

  “No,” said Allen. “Keep them wanting. Make them scarce. These six are fine for now. What you need to do, Luke, is embrace that raw emotion again. These paintings were just typical, clinical studies of perfect little scenes before. If people wanted that they’d take a picture. They buy your paintings because of how they make them feel.”

  Luke trudged back over to the easel by the window where his most recent painting of Hunter still sat, undisturbed. He sank onto the stool and slowly shook his head before looking back at Allen.

  “Sometimes I feel like I’m trying to catch lightning in a bottle,” he sighed.

  “You’re not talking about the paintings anymore, are you?”

  Luke shook his head. “No matter what I do I can’t stop thinking about him. He’s right next door to me, so close, and yet I still can’t have him. I find myself painting him into scenes that he doesn’t even belong in and sketching him when I’m trying to think of new paintings. I knew I loved him before, but I didn’t realize how much of a hold he had on me until all of this.”

  “Let’s put this in the show as well,” suggested Allen as he approached the easel. “This piece alone is far better than most of the stuff you’ve done recently.”

  Luke shook his head. “He’s working for you now. What’s he going to do if he walks into that gallery and finds it full of pictures of himself?”

  “Pictures of himself naked,” corrected Allen. “I get where you’re coming from, but the gallery is opening whether you’re ready or not. If those walls aren’t full of quality work then you and I might as well retire now.”

  “We can use some of the Hunter paintings, maybe,” relented Luke. “But I’ll fill out the gallery with other stuff as well. I don’t want his face on every wall and I certainly don’t want any of the nudes in there.”

  “I’ll look through the ones you gave me to store. I’m sure we can make something work.”

  “I WANTED TO TALK TO you about what happened last night.” Hunter’s text came later that same evening.

  Luke looked back at the half finished painting he was working on and sighed. He really couldn’t spare the time at the moment. As much as he hated to turn down an offer to talk with Hunter, he had no other choice.

  Not only was his reputation as an artist at stake but Allen’s reputation was on the line as well. He wasn’t going to let his closest friend’s business suffer because he had slacked off.

  With a heavy heart, he picked up the cellphone again. “Really busy prepping for Allen’s show. I’m sorry. I can’t right now.” He hit send on the message before he could overthink things too much. He hoped Hunter would understand.

  Setting aside the phone, he picked up his brush again, and turned back to the painting. The scene lacked life, vibrancy. He was trying to infuse it with emotion but seemed to be failing. He dragged his brush lazily across the canvas, smearing the scene and dragging the colors into a muddy streak through the center of the painting.

  A slight smile touched the corner of his lips. Perhaps this was it. Like the paintings earlier. A perfect scene, marred in some way. This was what he needed to infuse interest into his work.

  The cellphone chimed, dragging his attention away from the canvas once more.

  “You’ve still got to eat, right? Breakfast?” read Hunter’s text.

  Luke smiled to himself. It looked like Hunter wasn’t at all deterred. He quickly typed back, “Breakfast sounds great. My place at 7?”

  Less than a minute later, another reply. “Sure.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  “So this is what you’re putting in the show?” asked Hunter, looking through the canvases stacked against the far wall of Luke’s apartment.

  “Some of it,” said Luke with a shrug. “I know they’re not very good, but there’s not a lot of time left.”

  Luke was making breakfast in the kitchen while Hunter wandered around. No cooking lesson today; Luke was too busy prepping for the show, which was understandable.

  “That’s not true,” said Hunter, looking at a park scene that was covered in paint. “They...” his voice trailed off as he stared at the painting. “I feel like this is a lot of what my life is like right now. I can’t get a full picture of anything. I’ve got the things that people have told me, and I’ve got the things that I’ve seen, but there are still these big gaps I can’t fill in. I can get a sense of the emotion, the color, of the situation, but I can’t grasp it. There’s no understanding there.”

  He looked over at Luke and forced a smile. “Sorry if that’s depressing.”

  “No, don’t be sorry,” said Luke, shaking his head. “Art is kind of like that. It says something different to everyone. I guess I didn’t realize that it would be so personal for you.”

  “I know you’re pretty busy right now,” said Hunter, peering over at the easel where a blank canvas sat awaiting paint. “I probably shouldn’t be bothering you with my problems right now.”

  “I told you before that I’m here if you need anything,” said Luke, setting a plate on the table. “I’m sorry I couldn’t take you up on it last night.”

  “Omelets?” asked Hunter as he approached the table. His stomach was a little queasy and he wasn’t sure how much he was actually going to be able to eat.

  “Stuffed with mushrooms, cheese and spinach.” Luke smiled as he brought a second plate to the table and sat down.

  Hunter joined him, but the smell of food made his stomach turn. He swallowed hard to fight back the urge to vomit.

  “Are you alright?” asked Luke, pushing at his plate and reaching across the table towards Hunter.

  “Y-yeah,” said Hunter, nodding his head. “Just a little bit of an upset stomach. It’ll pass.”

  “Is this more of the same thing?”

  “I think it was just a bug. I was a lot better the last few days, so it’s probably almost over.” Hunter tried to sound confident as he slid his plate to one side so the smell wasn’t wafting directly up into his face. “I’m sorry to make you cook for me only to not eat it.”

  “It wasn’t that much extra work,” shrugged Luke. “Besides this was just an excuse for us to talk anyway, wasn’t it?”

  Hunter smiled. “You saw right through me.”

  “You were going to ask about me and Vincent, right? Why we hate each other?” asked Luke, leaning back in his chair.

  “I’m sure you don’t want to talk about it, but I’ve already heard one half of the story. I asked Allen, but he wouldn’t give me any details except that the half I heard wasn’t true.” Hunter had debated asking his mother instead, but he still wasn’t sure he was ready to open that can of worms. He’d gone through so much to escape that going to her for advice felt almost hypocritical.

  “I’m sure that Vincent told you all kinds of stuff about me,” began Luke, “but the fact that you’re here talking to me probably means you didn’t believ
e him.”

  “Honestly, I don’t know what to believe anymore,” admitted Hunter. “I’ve realized I can’t just trust what anyone tells me, but it’s been difficult to figure out who to ask.”

  “So if I tell you my story, it’s just my word against his. Why would you believe either of us?”

  Hunter sighed. “I don’t know. I guess, at some point I’ll figure it out. I can only go with what I know about the two of you so far. I feel like Vincent went crazy at some point. His stunt outside took me completely by surprise. I still don’t know what he was trying to accomplish.”

  “It was a power move,” said Luke. “He’s used them on you before. In fact, he’s used that exact same stunt on you before. Except you were both still in college. The words were slightly different, but the concept was the same. It’s all to get you to do something you didn’t necessarily want to do. You take his hand and he wins. It’s psychological and every time he wins you get a little weaker and he gets a little stronger.”

  Hunter shook his head and frowned. “But why? Everything was fine. Why would he do that?”

  “I can sit here and speculate on Vincent’s motives all day long. But I won’t. All I know is you fell for his tricks before, and he probably thought you’d fall for them again. He had you almost completely under his control back then.” Luke’s expression had grown dark. His opinion of Vincent was not high. If what he was saying was true, then Hunter couldn’t really blame him.

  “So, if it wasn’t for the amnesia...” Hunter’s voice trailed off and he noticed a pained expression on Luke’s face.

  “The details aren’t really important,” said Luke, shaking his head slowly. “The fact of the matter is that our mutual hatred for one another is because he treated you like crap, and I actively defied him over it. It’s two alpha males battling over an omega they both want.”

  Luke nearly choked as he finished speaking. His eyes grew wide, and he stared at Hunter with a dumbfounded expression.

  Hunter felt his cheeks flush and a sly smile crept to his lips. “So, you ‘want’ me?” he teased.

  “I-I meant, ‘that they both want to protect.’ I just got cut off there at the end. That’s all.” Luke laughed nervously and looked up at the ceiling.

  “Sure,” said Hunter with a laugh, rising from the chair and pacing across the living room. He looked towards the blank canvas, facing a comfortable looking lounge chair and the window overlooking the city.

  His skin felt flushed and his pulse had quickened. An electric tingle of excitement prickled across his skin. The idea rattling around in his brain wasn’t necessarily a fully fleshed out one, but it sounded fun. Luke was attractive, and the time they’d spent together had been enjoyable. Why couldn’t they have a little fun together?

  This would change their relationship, certainly, but it would be the first change that Hunter himself had initiated. He wanted that. Craved it. Just like he felt himself craving closeness from the man sitting on the other side of the room.

  “Why don’t I help you out a little?” suggested Hunter, turning coyly towards Luke who had risen from his chair.

  “Wha—“

  “Well, you’re trying to paint things for the show right? So why don’t you paint me?” Hunter bit his lip and smiled.

  “I-I could...” Luke seemed unsure of himself as he moved towards the easel. “I just...well, painting takes a long time, and I’m sure you don’t want to pose for that long.”

  Hunter locked eyes with Luke and winked at him before pulling his shirt over his head. The cool air of the apartment sent chills across his skin and his nipples hardened almost instantly. He was a little surprised by his own audacity. The heat of the moment, the building desire in his chest, pushed him forward. In a way he felt like it was already too late to turn back. He needed to see this through now and find out whether or not his bid for physical connection would be well received.

  “Hunter...” Luke sounded a little nervous. Was he uncomfortable or uncertain?

  “This is what artists do, right?” asked Hunter as he kicked off his shoes and began unfastening his belt. “They paint nude models, don’t they?” His pants slid towards the floor, and he was standing only in his underwear now.

  He felt a small sense of satisfaction at the dumbfounded expression on Luke’s face. Now Luke had a taste of how sheepish Hunter had felt when he answered the door in his underwear.

  “Of course, I can just leave if you don’t want—“

  “No! No, it’s fine,” insisted Luke, quickly moving behind his canvas and rifling through his collection of brushes.

  Hunter smiled and hooked his fingers in the band of his underwear. When Luke leaned around the canvas to see if he was ready, Hunter grinned and let them slide to the floor.

  “What are you staring at?” asked Hunter blushing under the attention. “It’s like you’ve never seen a naked man before.”

  “You’re beautiful,” breathed Luke, leaving the easel and stepping towards him.

  Hunter felt his heartbeat quicken, and his chest tightened as the distance between them disappeared. He hadn’t been sure what to expect at first, but now it was clear which direction this was all heading in. Luke gingerly reached out and traced his fingers along Hunter’s ribs, caressing his bare skin with the gentle touch of a seasoned lover.

  There were scarce millimeters between them now. Luke’s lips hovered just out of reach, as if he was afraid to close the gap and initiate. Everything was up to Hunter.

  His heart pounded in his chest and blood rushed in his ears as Hunter pressed forward, brushing his lips against Luke’s. The kiss began hesitantly as Luke seemed to reel from the sudden contact. Once he recovered, however, the kiss deepened. Their mouths melted into one another as their tongues intertwined.

  They broke breathlessly, and Hunter found Luke searching his face. Was he perhaps hoping Hunter’s memories had returned? That somehow that kiss had broken the spell over him? Would going further be a mistake?

  “I do want you,” breathed Luke as he took Hunter in his arms..

  The words sent chills down Hunter’s spine and sent butterflies coursing through his belly. That confession was more than he had expected. He’d wanted to play around and feel some sort of physical connection. He hadn’t anticipated the rush coursing through his veins at simply being told that he was wanted. He could feel his body heat rising. He pressed upwards again, meeting Luke’s lips, and kissing him forcefully. Desire and primal need fueled and guided him as he slid his hands beneath Luke’s shirt.

  It only took seconds for Luke to shed the garment and resume kissing Hunter. Slowly, Luke’s kisses migrated down Hunter’s neck and shoulder before Luke lifted him up off the ground and deposited him on the nearby lounge chair.

  This is really happening. That thought echoed through Hunter’s head as he hit the cushions and Luke began placing kisses across his belly while continuing his journey south. He felt himself trembling with anticipation.

  A moment later, Hunter’s breath caught in his throat as Luke’s lips closed around his shaft. The intimate warmth spread through him, and he gasped in pleasure beneath the attention. Luke was all too eager to please and seemed encouraged by Hunter’s reaction.

  Luke reached up with one hand and gingerly caressed Hunter’s face as he continued to push him towards climax using nothing but his own skill.

  Hunter was overwhelmed. Nothing he had ever experienced compared to what he was feeling now. The gentle, attentive, and skillful attention to his body was more than he had anticipated. He hadn’t expected to feel this flooded with sensation. He could feel his body building towards something even more pleasurable, something he couldn’t have possibly prepared for.

  It hit him like a lightning strike, his entire body spilling forth in waves of white hot pleasure. Hunter’s back arched up off the chair and he gasped at the intensity of it. As the moment passed, his chest heaved and he struggled for a moment to catch his breath.

  This moment woul
d be etched into his thoughts forever. He hadn’t expected something purely physical would arouse so much emotion within him. The want for connection with another human being had been met. In that moment, Hunter felt closer to Luke than he had to any other person on the planet.

  His eyes met Luke’s as Luke sat back on his heels and smiled up at him.

  “Was that your first time since the accident?” asked Luke.

  “I...I mean...like I know about sex, but I didn’t think it would feel like that.” Hunter gasped as he slowly dragged himself upright. “Does it always feel like that?”

  “I imagine you were a bit built up so it was probably a little more intense than usual,” laughed Luke.

  “I...” Hunter felt exhilarated. “Can I do that for you?”

  “You don’t have to,” said Luke. “I’ll be all right.”

  Hunter frowned. “What was the point of all this then if you’re not going to get anything out of it?”

  “I don’t want you to feel obligated to do something just because I did it for you,” said Luke with a shrug.

  “But I don’t,” insisted Hunter, sliding towards the end of the lounge chair. “I want to do it for you because that felt amazing and you deserve some too.”

  Hunter leaned in and pressed his lips against Luke’s. Luke was hesitant at first, but slowly kissed him back. Finally he seemed to relent and rose curling an arm around Hunter and pulling him close.

  “I think you deserve a little more though,” breathed Luke, pressing his lips against Hunter’s neck. He stood and pulled Hunter to his feet as well. Luke led him across the loft to the bedroom.

  Luke shed the last of his clothing and they fell together onto the mattress. The closeness of their bodies, the heat of their skin, was enough to coax Hunter’s pent up body back into action.

  Luke was gentle and attentive as he caressed Hunter’s body, taking his time and forcing Hunter’s overeager raw instinct to slow down and enjoy the moment. He retrieved the bottle of lubricant from the side table and began to gently massage Hunter into readiness.